What to do when you are angry?
How do you channel your anger?
Those questions are simply lame. When you’re angry, your brain goes on auto pilot mode and blocks unnecessary happy thoughts and sends illogical signal that fuels the rage in your heart that somehow leads us to the answer of how we channel our anger. By being angry and lash it out. Of course that is when self control, or the thing we call ‘a little voice within’ tries to remind us not to be too violent when we are lashing out.
Alright, that was me and I was SAD and MAD at the same time, SMAD, a couple of days ago. My hubby lost his wallet and inside that very wallet was the money to pay bills and our worker’s monthly salary. He told me at 3a.m in the morning via phone because he was just about to get home from the office while I was still working on some paper works, did not sleep the day before, and had to attend a meeting after lunch in that day. So there I was, neglected my works and just cuddle in the blanket next to Amiko and gave myself in to deep sleep. I thought that way was better so I could clear my head to face him in the morning.
The alarm woke us up at 5:30a.m. We did our morning routine and drove Amiko to school with smiles on our faces despite the serious lack of sleep we had been having lately and thus my interrogation, and lashing out, begun the instant Amiko stepped inside her school. I knew I was not supposed to be really angry at him, but he was always a forgetful man when it came to his belongings. I admit I was quite rude at that time, he did not deserve it. Who would want to lose his wallet and money anyway? So I did apologize though I know he couldn’t just accept it right away after the harsh words I said and I completely understood that.
So the silence was quite deafening on our way back and I despite the anger that I still felt, I also felt a strange need to eat some cinnamon rolls. Lots..and lots of cinnamon rolls.
So I browsed and found a recipe in allrecipes that I hoped would be quite forgiving since I had never made cinnamon rolls before. Oh, what was I thinking? I could not care less. The moment we arrived at home, I went straight to the kitchen. I was glad that my kitchen is well stocked so I didn’t have to worry of not finding the ingredients.
Tadaaaaa...
I could not be even more satisfied.
At first I was afraid that the yeast would fail me. But it did not. In fact, it was strangely a very calming experience. My retreat whenever I feel a bit off or depressed is my kitchen. I love to cook because it is pretty therapeutic and ease my mind from troubling thoughts. Baking bread, though it is not the first time for me, I found out is seriously good when you need anger to burn. All that kneading and punching and twisting the pliable dough is…now my answer to the second lame question above.
These were not the best looking rolls, that I admit. But the texture, the taste were the WINNERS!
Here is the recipe if you want to make it at home. I, myself, will personally call it "Hubby Pleasing Rolls".
Ingredients:
3/4 cup milk
1/4 cup margarine, softened
3 1/4 cups all-purpose flour
1 (.25 ounce) package instant yeast
1/4 cup white sugar
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/4 cup water
1 egg
1 cup brown sugar, packed
1 tablespoon ground cinnamon
1/2 cup margarine, softened
1/2 cup raisins (optional)
Directions:
Heat the milk in a small saucepan until it bubbles, remove from heat. Mix in margarine; stir until melted. Let cool until lukewarm.
In a large mixing bowl, combine 2 1/4 cup flour, yeast, sugar and salt; mix well. Add water, egg and the milk mixture; beat well. Add the remaining flour, 1/2 cup at a time, stirring well after each addition. When the dough has just pulled together, turn it out onto a lightly floured surface and knead until smooth, about 5 minutes.
Cover the dough with a damp cloth and let rest for 10 minutes. Meanwhile, in a small bowl, mix together brown sugar, cinnamon, softened margarine.
Roll out dough into a 12x9 inch rectangle. Spread dough with margarine/sugar mixture. Sprinkle with raisins if desired. Roll up dough and pinch seam to seal. Cut into 12 equal size rolls and place cut side up in lightly greased pan. Cover and let rise until doubled, about 30 minutes.
Preheat oven to 375 degrees F (190 degrees C).
Bake in the preheated oven for 20 minutes, or until browned. Serve warm.
My tip in making the rolls is just knead it till you feel like your hands are going to break. Seriously. In my experience of baking bread, I have never managed to make soft bread. That is why the only bread I make regularly for my family are sourdough bread, rustic bread, ones that does not involve sore feeling on your hands. Well, I guess anger has its benefits. I was kneading like a baker from hell :D
I will also use whole wheat flour the next time I bake these, use butter instead of margarine, and add pecans to make it even more delectable.
My pan was not big enough and I got 2 rolls left so I decided to make a heart shape and put it inside my pie tin. Simply adorable.
So when these lovely buns were done, the house smelled exotic. I love the smell of cinnamon. So does my husband who was feeling mellow and was still blaming himself for the wallet incident. I made him a cup of hot jasmine tea and served these with a big grin on my face. He lit up like a Christmas tree and the Grinch was instantly gone. I love how he couldn’t come up with the words to say on how good these rolls were because these were that good. I did apologize again for the sake of dramatizing things. Well, what can you expect? I love drama, great drama. A bit of drama is always good if played in the right time and in the right mood. So in the end, we hugged and kissed and forgave each other.
Wallet? What wallet?
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